7) Dear reader,

I realize that sometimes I may come off pompous - as if I had millions of readers eagerly waiting for my latest entry. Trust, that is not my mindset. I don't think my story is so unique, nor any more compelling than that of the next person - Polyamorous or not. It's just I'm trying my best to make light of my current predicament...and I find writing blogging therapeutic. So I approach it in my usual and confident manner - with some pep. And to be honest, I'd rather not join the ranks of depressed bloggers contributing to an already gargantuan mountain of sad break-up stories. I gotta be more than optimistic about my situation. I gotta be confident, damn near arrogant about it. Otherwise, I'd only be helping to reinforce the idea that Polyamory can't work.

To the diehard Monogamist. I see you. I picture you waiting for the collapse of yet another failed attempt at Polyamory, so you can stand there all smug like, "See? I told you it doesn't work."
To which I reply, "Stay tuned. We shall see."

I, for one, happen to think Monogamy is great. My marriage to Jasmine is testament to that. It's a beautiful thing indeed to find someone you are so deeply in love with that you plan on spending the rest of your life with them. An elderly couple, together for decades and still madly in love, is something to envy no doubt. There's no denying they give us something to aspire after. Hence, movies such as Notebook are considered all-time favorites; and anyone lucky enough to be in that kind of relationship has a pretty sweet deal. All props due. But if love can be shared beyond the norm of two people - and everyone involved is happy - perhaps even happier for it; then I'd say that's a pretty sweet deal too. Wouldn't you? Alas, some people are not so fortunate, and instead spend their entire Monogamous life, in one relationship after another....all in the never ending pursuit of true love. Elusive as it may seem, they never give up. Can you blame them? Love is the most beautiful feeling in the world. And yet, as often as this happens - you don't hear the average person belittle Monogamy with, "See? I told you it doesn't work."

Life. To each his own.

I try my best not to subscribe to conformity. Not because I'm trying to champion a cause or feel I'm some sort of rebel going up against the 'Machine', but because I strongly believe "Life is what you make it." I chose to explore Polyamory - before I knew there was a word for it; before I discovered that it was a lifestyle practiced by many. Jasmine and I stumbled into it, as previously mentioned. But now that I know there are others - do I feel I'm more bold? More passionate? Or more enlightened than the next man? No. No. And no. I'm just living out my life the best way I see fit - so long as my wife and kids are also leading happy lives.

Will my quad work out in the long run? Man, I don't know. If my intuition was that keen, I would've probably begged, borrowed and stole to put down some serious moolah on Google back when they first went public. But I'll be damned if I don't give this all I got. I'm going for the gusto. All the while, I will continue to be my usual cocky, trash-talking, good-spirited self and more than likely my writings will reflect such. Therefore, I would like thank everyone who actually finds this blog interesting enough to spend time on (whether you regularly follow or not). Thank ya. You are too kind.

Your boy Marco, signing off.

Mutemath - You Are Mine


Natja's Natterings said...

The monogamists are wrong, poly CAN work but it takes a LOT of hard graft and emotional courage to make it work. We have to face our fears, our demons and sometimes that is the hardest part of poly.

Forget what people think, do what is right for you and those you love.


Marco said...

I couldn't agree more. By the way, I'm really feeling what you guys are doing over at Polyglot. Good stuff.

Administrator at said...


I found you through natja's blogs and really like what you've done with your blog! It's rare to see a quad (at least in my part of the woods). I hope you continue this blog, it's interesting and well written. I finished reading it this morning!

On a side note, I liked it so much that I want to put it on my blog roll on my website and wanted to ask your permission to do so.

My website is a new poly community that is mostly non secular and focuses on fidelity and long term plural relationships (both polygamy and poly fidelity). Your link would appear in a sticky post and would eventually be put into part of the layout after I'm done figuring everything out.

The website can be found here:


Marco said...

Thank you. I checked your site out and I gotta say I am very intrigued. Polygamy, Polyfidelity, Polyamory....it's all love. I look forward to it's blossoming into the resourceful Poly forum it's primed to be. And so of course, by all means add this to your blog roll. It would be my pleasure. Again, thank you; and yes, I most definitely intend on continuing this blog for a long time.

elizabeth said...

I could'nt agree on that because I feel bonding refers to the emotional covenant that links a man and woman together for life and makes them intensely valuable to one another.I have had this wonderful dating experience which might be quite surprising for many people who read this.

persian profiles

Marco said...


Your feelings for sticking with Monogamy is commendable. Like I said, to each his own. I'm glad you have taken the time to read the entry and reply though.

I tried to read about your dating experience but was lead to a dating site. Perhaps you put the wrong link?

Anonymous said...

Well what can I add to this ?

I had no idea about Polyamory when I found myself in a situation I didn't understand at all at the time...... I spent hours tied in knots thinking how wrong it seemed. I was a married woman, having sex with friends of ours for the first time. We started as a quad & now we are a triad .
That seems a very long time ago now. But my marrige has now come to a very messy end. But I am still in Love with the couple I first become poly with, over four years ago.... Yes I believe it can work it is not easy you have to work at it as you do any relationship. You can be in love with more than one person at a time, sharring is the key thing, along with & openess :) Carol

Sarah said...

Thank you thank you thank you! Your attitude toward those who think and believe differently than you, and who may even condemn you, is so refreshing! Every soul in this world is different and every person's life experiences are different. And that is a most beautiful thing! The one thing we all share is the desire for love.
I found your blog as I was thinking about starting one of my own, about my quad. My husband and I went from die-hard monogamists to eventually falling madly in love with another couple. I would never have imagined that fate had this in store for me. If I ever do get a blog started I'll share it with you :)

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